Archive for category Homelife

Some weeks ago, a student of mine posed a question to me in the minutes before class began:

If you could meet five people, from any time in history, who would they be?

I didn’t have time to think about the notion then, and I’d essentially forgotten all about it until just now. But I’ve pondered it for the past three minutes or so, and I think I’ve got a working answer, which is to break these five spots into categories — personal, religious, political, cultural, and spiteful — and I’ll choose one figure from each.

For many reasons, this kind of list is inherently dependent upon the context of the moment and the individual. My answer probably won’t be the same tomorrow. And even my idea of categories might break down altogether: After the next presidential lie-a-thon debate, for instance, I might want just five political figures; that would give me more folks with whom to drink away our dreams for the future of this nation.

Regardless, here’s the list for now:

1. [Personal] My Grandfather. When I was in eighth grade, I won the school science fair and got to go to the state competition. My grandfather on my mom’s side had been a science teacher, and he was, in the purest sense of the word, a good man. We had always been close, and so I called him. He was thrilled. He said he was proud of me. He was coming to visit us soon, and he couldn’t wait to hear all about it. That was the last time I spoke to him, and I’d like to see him just once more, just for a moment, just to tell him that I love him and to hear him say — as I hope he is — that he’s proud of me.

2. [Religious] Jesus. Some good comes from religion. So does a whole hell of a lot of evil (far more than comes of atheism, as it happens, but that’s another topic). In fact, I’m devilishly tempted to fill the rest of this list with religious founders just so that I could get them all to see what is done in their names. Then I’d parade them out in front of everyone so we could all get their stories straight. Probably wouldn’t go well, though. I suspect that a great many Christians would stone Jesus in the name of Jesus. Would be surreal, but sorta not cool.

3. [Political] Thomas Jefferson. I will freely admit my bias in saying this: I think that mine is the greatest country on the planet. And it is so because of a group of flawed human beings who saw their weaknesses and their strengths and wisely came together to form for this new world a new vision of freedom. I’d like to chat with them all, frankly, but I think I’m most fascinated by Jefferson. No, America doesn’t get everything right. Health care is a mess. Our political system is dangerously fractured by demagogues and ideologues. And in the name of freedom we are astonishingly willing to sacrifice our freedoms and those of others. Frankly, I’d like to know what Jefferson would think of it all. I don’t know that he’d have great solutions, mind you — he’d probably be too mesmerized by my iPhone to think straight — but it would be fun to talk with him about the issues just the same.

4. [Cultural] Geoffrey Chaucer. I know, I’m a homer. It’s honestly a tough call betwixt my boy Geoffrey, Shakespeare, Mozart, and Michelangelo, but in any case it mostly comes down to me wanting to shake the man’s hand. Sure, I’d also like to ask them some questions — “So, Geoff, did you really intend to write more Canterbury tales? And how did you die, anyway?” — but more than anything I would just like to shake their hands firmly, look them in the eyes, and say thanks.

5. [Spiteful] Adolf Hitler. I want the chance to kick him in the gonads. Scratch that. I want us all to have the chance to kick him in the gonads. Town by town, country by country, I’ll take Hitler around the world he wanted to rule and give everyone an opportunity to line up and swing away. I’ll ask only for donations — a dollar, a dime, a can of corn for the homeless, whatever you can afford — and it’ll be the greatest tour in history: “Kick Hitler in the Sack! In Topeka for One Night Only!”

So that’s five for the moment. Who y’all got?

Some weeks ago, I bought a bike. The fact that I haven’t posted about it surely shows how busy I’ve been — because it’s a cool bike and it’s worth talking about.

Indeed, since I live and work at a college and I ride the bike in the biggest city park in Charleston, I’ve ended up talking a fair bit about my new wheels, to both colleagues and students. I didn’t buy the bike to “get noticed,” but there’s no question that it has happened.

Why, you ask?

Because my bike is a folding bike. More than that, it’s a really cool folding bike.

As background to how I got these nifty wheels, I should point out two things that loomed large in my decision making:

1. I live in Charleston and have no garage. These combined facts mean that storing things outside will result in rust and algae blooming upon them. If you want to keep something nice you need to keep it inside, which means it’ll take up living space. I was thus in the market for a folding bike.
2. The older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve started to favor quality over cost in my purchasing decisions. That’s not to say that money is no object — believe me, money matters in our house! — but I am increasingly interested in viewing purchases across a long term investment than across a short term impact. I was thus in the market for a good quality folding bike.

What I decided on was the Tern Link D7i. Tern is a new company, but it’s a sort of off-shoot from Dahon Bikes, which is a well-established player in the folding bike field. I liked what Tern seemed to be doing for the price range they were at, and the early reviews of their bikes looked positive.

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On December 1st, I wrote a post that was equal parts letter to Sharp and expression of lament on the passing of my beloved graphing calculator.

My Sharp EL-9300C had been with me since high school. We’d lived in 6 states together. We’d shared gains and divided losses. We’d integrated laughter, derived smiles, and even graphed hearts.

Alas, the calculator croaked. I’d say it was an untimely passing, but I reckon that twenty-odd years is pushing it for graphing calculator lifetimes.

I can’t complain but …. well, it still hurt.

Fast-forward a few months and … lo!  It has risen!

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